I just realized that I didn't get a coffee for over a month now. How amazing am I at saving money.
So did I learn to be thrify all of a sudden, or is it that my life has been severely out of order? You tell me.
I had planned something totally different from this. Well, my plan never works, and it's alright if it doesn't. But until this moment I got hit by a headache, my reasoning has been absent in my brain. Yes I didn't take control of my own life and just let it drift, and yes it's going down a waterfall and gonna hit the bottom soon. This isn't the way it is supposed to be.
Honestly I'm not smart enough to plan ahead too much, so knowing what to do tomorrow is just fine. I don't anticipate what comes after a month or a year; i'll figure it out the day before. If I'm not doing what I should do now, tomorrow isn't gonna get any better.
And I'll live my life the way I want now, even if it means going in a different direction. God is still with me, and he told me not to worry: I don't have the responsibility to plan out the entire future; all I can do is not to waste today.
I don't know if it means to make a U-turn, but if it is, let it be done, regardless of the consequence. Maybe this is something foolish to do, but I'm tired of being a fool all along. I know something in my life is important, but that doesn't mean I should ignore everything else important altogether.
The snowman already melted yesterday. Strangely, when I finally got over this in my mind, the sky cleared up and it's a nice day in front of me. Guess I'll just go down to the slope and enjoy a warm, bright afternoon. On this day, I will set aside all other business, and breath in some fresh, crispy air, under this blue blue sky.